A half year
This week it's exactly six months
ago that everything around Linda's death and funeral took place.
Last Saturday it was the 8th of June. That day we went to Selwerderhof
and at about 16.15 hours Paul remarked that exactly 6 months
ago we were still very hopeful that Linda would recover. But
this hope was destroyed that same day at 20.15 hours. Then Linda's
young life was over.
It's weird that this month the dates 8 and 13 are on the same
days as in December. That does make everything a lot harder than
e.g. the month before. The 8th of every month is hard of course,
but now specifically because 8 is on Saturday again and so 13
is once more on Thursday. In thought everything is experienced
again. What happened on this day 6 months ago?
We're both working (again). It pleases me. I shouldn't think
of being home together all day, every day. It could cause overemotional
scenes. It's not that bad of course and part of the mourning
process. It's just so tiring doing nothing all day. Working gives
a kind of distraction especially on these specific days. Others
may feel it differently of course. Maybe it doesn't occur to
them so much. Life goes on for everyone. A bit slower and harder
for us maybe, but we also have to get on with our life.
There will always remain hard days, but this is logical of course.
There are also good moments when something happens that reminds
you of Linda with a smile on your face. As long as we have those
happy memories we can still smile (maybe even laugh). And that's
good. We have to go on, although it will happen with a little
smile every now and then and a load of tears.